This article appeared in diredota.com and has been published here with permission.
Even though this woman was going to make dinner for a guy she was really into that night, her boss made her work late. With not enough time to spare, she did some of the prepping in the subway. When people shed tears due to the chopped onion, she had to stop.
On the Moscow subway, pets are strictly forbidden. This woman, though, needs to bring her cat between her and her ex-husband's house, as their divorce papers specify that they have joint custody of Snuggles. To transport the kitty, she dons a Dick Tracy raincoat and stuffs Snuggles in there. You can tell from the suspicious and intense look on her face that she does not want to be photographed, as this picture could be used as evidence against her, and she could get her train pass revoked.
This morning, instead of doing her morning routine in the comfort of her own home, she decided to do it on the train. During the morning rush hour. Nobody looked twice when she started applying her makeup on the train. However, when it got to the oral hygiene portion of her daily routine, strangers looked on in disbelief. She even spit into her leather bag. Next time, just use mouthwash strips, or better yet, just wake up a bit earlier and do it all at home.
This night, this woman was drinking especially heavily at the bar, trying to make it look like she was having a fun time, because she was there with friends that included her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend. She wanted to make it look like she was loving life, but really, all she could think about all night was when she could leave and eat pizza. She passed out and dropped the pizza, but because of the lucky placement of parchment paper, she awoke and still finished it.